14 June 2010

Let's Do This

About a year and a half ago I went through a phase were I watched House a lot.  It was frequently on TNT or USA or one of those stations that replays old episodes of popular shows over and over.  One night, while watching, Dr. House said something on the show that really struck me.  He was talking to Cuddy and said something like, "You're not happy unless everything is perfect.  This means that you're good at your job; but it also means that you'll never be happy."

When I heard that I had one of those moments where I felt like the universe was speaking to me through my television.  It might not seem like it, but underneath the surface, I am a perfectionist.  While this can be good in some aspects, it can be really negative in others.  My tendency toward perfectionism makes me give up when I shouldn't.  Sometimes I won't even try at all just so I don't have to deal with not being able to achieve at the level I expect of myself.

Enter my blog. 

I have a really hard time really committing to writing on my blog.  I'm not the greatest writer and many of the things I write about are totally cliche.  Several times in the past, I've seriously considered getting rid of my blog all together.  This might not seem like a big deal except that I really like having my blog.  I like being able to tell stories or vent about life or express a profound thought (hahaha).  Why would I give up something that I actually really like having?

I decided that I'm going to put myself out there a little bit and stop worrying about the fact that my blog isn't as creative or well-written or interesting as others.  I'd like to write on my blog more regularly and not worry about being judged by readers.  I'd like to find a niche for my blog because I think that having a focus would really help me.  And I would like to revamp the look of it.

This might seem silly, but I've really been inspired by some of the blogs I subscribe to.  They are the sort of blog that make me feel happy and positive about life.  I'd like to have that with my blog, too.  Not necessarily for others.  Rather, I'd like it to be a source of happiness for myself.  When I started this blog, I did it for me, so that I would have somewhere to express myself.  I want to get back to writing for me without worries of what other people think about it and without being scared off by perfection.

2 comments:

D.M. Keating said...

you ain't too perfectionistic!
just....devoted to having things in a pimp way??

I hope this was helpful. or at least not unhelpful

Mel said...

It was. Thanks, David. I do like things to be "pimp"-ish.